“There is no passion to be found in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.” – Nelson Mandela
When I give my talks, I sometimes share a story about a woman who climbed and reached the top of Mt Everest, the highest mountain in the world. When asked how she felt that she had conquered the highest mountain in the world, she answered by saying: “I never conquered the mountain and no one will ever conquer the mountain, I only conquered the fears and limitations in me.” Wow, this was seriously profound. When you really conquer the negative thoughts, ideas and wrong advices that create False Expectations Appearing Real (FEAR), you’ll live your life freely and your life will be used as a good example for generations to come. So, what is really stopping you from doing the thing/s that you so want to do?
I truly believe that it’s much better and rewarding to look back on your life and say: “Wow, I can’t believe I did that.” Than to look back on your life with tears in your eyes saying: “Oh, how I wish I did that.” This will haunt you for the rest of your life. For me, low self-esteem and underestimating my capabilities and potentials stopped me as they created FEAR in me. I couldn’t see myself achieving any of my goals, I was under the impression that the answers were lying outside of me. I just woke up one day in May 27 2011 and decided I didn’t want to feel like that ever again, so I changed just like that. I have since learned that what you see in life entirely depends on what you are looking for.
I made a list of things I was scared of or feared, from small to big ones. I started off by confronting the small ones to gain confidence. I remember taking my boys to Gold Reef City for the rides. I told them I was going to confront my FEARS from that day on and I was going to ride all the roller-coasters that I was scared of for all the years. They laughed at me and said, “Really?” I started riding on the Anaconda, Runaway train, Golden loop, etc. I rode them again and again, by the end of the day I was different. I realized that for all the years it was never about those roller-coasters but me, I allowed FEAR of NOTHING to steal my happiness and freedom. That’s how I built my confidence and moved on to bigger things.
So, my advice to you:
- First identify and write down the thing/s you fear;
- Take one step forward to approach it;
- Take the second step. Don’t rush yourself, but do push yourself. Once you find yourself able to handle the first rung on YOUR FEAR ladder with less anxiety,
- Move to the next one. Once you begin to get comfortable with facing YOUR FEARS,
- Don’t stop. Keep going!
The last thing is to get yourself a coach and or mentor who will keep you focused and stay the course.
You are God’s highest form of creation, your gifts and talents were given to you to make this world a better place than you found it, flatly refuse to take them to your grave with you!
Veli Ndaba is a Professional and Motivational Speaker, Life-Coach and Neuro Linguistic Programming Practitioner, Author of two books (You Are Born to Win, Your Dream is Calling You and SWITCH ON), Newspaper Columnist and Entrepreneur. To book him to help you and your team unleash your greatness, contact him on firstname.lastname@example.org , www.velindaba.co.za and 083 304 9773